“SOME OTHER FIGHTING RELATED ACTIVITIES HERE”: Top 30 funniest first draft comments (Part 1)


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We all know how frustrating writing the first draft of your novel can be – pulling  80,000 words out of thin air and trying to arrange them into a coherent, well-written piece of literature is never going to be easy.

We aren’t saying that beautiful first drafts don’t exist – they do – if you’re one of those people whose brain functions perfectly at all hours of the day, no matter how much of a tiring morning / day / evening / you’ve had.

If you’re like us though, and you often find yourself unable to spell your name after a hard days work or three letter words first thing in the morning, you may end up turning out a first draft littered with inaccuracies, swear words and ‘helpful’ comments reminding you of what you need to improve on in your second draft.

Here’s a list of our favourite, funny and often rude ‘notes to self’.
We apologise in advance for the awful language (which is by no means a reflection of who we are as people), and is merely included in an effort to highlight just how awful (yet hilarious) a first draft can be!

  1. “What is he playing at we are so confused right now BRAH.”
  2. SOME OTHER FIGHTING RELATED ACTIVITIES HERE.”
  3. “…maybe they actually have a submarine? Who knows – not me yettt ahahahhhaha”
  4. “She looks super pretty and she feels it for the first time ever brah. even her freckles are ON POINTTTTT.”
  5. “I shrink back towards the wall. UM HI THERE IS NO WALL YOU ARE STOOD IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIELD YOU TW***T
  6. “I recognise the BLOND HAIR THAT I TOTALLY ALEADY MENTIONED, next to the dark hair and the bracelet wearing girl that I TOTALLY NOTICED EARLIER.”
  7. “Does the name CREEPY WOOD GUY ring any bells instead?”
  8. “Unless its now late afternoon? WHO THE F**K KNOWS JUST SORT YOUR S**T OUT.”
  9. “…someone for ten years OR WUTEVER YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN DOE>>>
  10. “He senses my WHATS THE WORD?!
  11. “He drew the short straw and now has to teach us fu***ers how to shoot people.
  12. “He looks sexyyyy. Haha.
  13. “(WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER PEEPS WHO ARE STRAIGHT CHILLING round the table).”
  14. “TRANSITION INTO the next scene here.”
  15. “He smiles at me (HE SMILES AN AWFUL LOT MAYBE HE NEEDS ANOTHER PHYSICAL TAG?).”
  16. “We run into the darkness HOLD UP IT WAS SUNNY A SECOND AGO
  17. “This is not the first time the mayor has done this. HE A MEANY PANTS.
  18. COME ON HEATHER LET’S THINK ABOUT THIS FOR A SECOND
  19. “She waits here until she realises that pr**k face has left.” 
  20. “She’s good at this because she’s good at blending in which makes her perf for this role.”
  21. “Then no other than w**ker himself comes out.
  22. “she sees her parents who look super fab but a little sad cos of the lack of their daughter“.
  23. “she sees X – what is his part in this whole shebang?.”
  24. “Maybe the villain is wearing a fancy headpiece. Im not sure TBH.”
  25. THIS NEEDS TO LINE UP PROPELRY OTHERWISE ITS STUPID AND DOESNT MAKE SENSE>
  26. “I have other things on my mind other than how DAMNNNNN SEXYYY he is.”
  27. ” he doesn’t break down and cry. (HE MUST BE ACTING SUPER SAD UP UNTIL THIS MOMENT).”
  28. “The twinkle in his eye has dessapeared, making way for a darker expression (AWESOME WRITNG BRAHHHH).”
  29. “BRAINWAVE”
  30. “Which is why WHATS THE VILLAINS NAME AGAIN

Aaaaannnnd that’s why you shouldn’t beat yourself up over your first draft – it can’t be much worse than ours! Do to the sheer number of comments we found on our drafts, you can read part 2 of this article here.

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